GLOBAL DOMINATION

IS DEAD

Audio Autopsy – April 2018

Audio Autopsy – April 2018

01/04/18  ||  Global Domination

Visigoth: Conqueror’s Oath

7.8/10

Habakuk: Shamelessly old school heavy metal of high quality. You like Enforcer (or what they like), you like these guys. 9

Myrkrarfar: In valiant heavy/power metal, there are three crucial requirements a band needs to fill. Let’s see Visigoth check of all the boxes: 1. A good vocalist? Check. Granted, Jake Rogers isn’t the second coming of Eric Adams, but his broad, bellowing voice fills the atmosphere with grit and conviction. 2. Great hooks and choruses? Check-ish. There are great moments but also more generic melodies and arrangements. These minor fallacies can be righted if you have… 3. Attitude? Yes. I mean check. Everything sounds honest and gripping, from the pounding drums to the barely-kept-in-check guitar shredding to Rogers’ charismatic vocals. All in all, Visigoth pass the Test of Heroes(TM) and are welcome to conquer my panties again. 7

Ziv: Old school American power metal, heavy on the old school with catchy songwriting and a rather decent singer. Even though lyrically the cheese factor is high, this one caught me off guard. 7

Aggressor: I like my metal naked like the chest of Conan. Clean songwriting and clean production that expose the strong, oily muscl… I mean melodies. 8

Necrophobic: Mark of the Necrogram

7.5/10

Habakuk: Okay, but a bit too polished for this kind of style, but a good reminder to get into some older Necrophobic again. 6

Myrkrarfar: Apparently the return of vocalist Strokirk and guitarists Ramstedt and Bergebäck have sparked the Necrospark into full flame and set the death/black metal world ablaze again. This is easily Necrophobic’s best album since “Darkside” some twenty-plus years ago, and if you do not listen – to hell with you! Tsaaaaaaar Bombaaaaa!!! 9

Ziv: Hailed as a return to their roots, Necrophobic’s newest recording endeavor stays on a predictable one dimensional track of sameness. At least the mid tempo songs offer some variety. A very good album but ultimately not a great one. 7

Aggressor: Guess I am more of a necrophiliac than a phobic, ‘cause this record is littered with hooks, some really good riffage and very tasteful guitar work. The vocals are a bit on the duller side, but man, I’m diggin’ this shit. 8

Usurpress: Interregnum

7.5/10

Habakuk: A punishing, solid pounding of Death. 7

Myrkrarfar: It’s not every day you hear a metal band with a unique sound, but Usurpress really surprise me with their blend of classic Swedeath, prog, atmospherics, psychedelia, Goth rock and a bunch of other stuff. What’s even more impressive is that it all works together. Check out “Interrectum” or I’ll visit your backside with a dance pole and go all Demi Moore on your ass. 8

Ziv: This time more experimental in their thought process, Usurpress deliver yet another monumental album of Swedish death metal. 8

Aggressor: Sometimes there’s prog, sometimes there’s goth rock. Sometimes it goes fast and aggressive and sometimes reeeally slow and moody, but it’s always blackened. 7

Long Distance Calling: Boundless

7.0/10

Habakuk: Instrumentool. Cool! 7

Myrkrarfar: A cool instrumental cinematic rock breeze on a hot, acrid day in the desert that is modern music, Long Distance Calling build atmospheres and moods with patience and, for the most part, drive the stake home. 7

Ziv: Beautiful instrumental music both heavy and ambient, melodic sans le fromage and strangely epic in its melancholia. 7

Aggressor: Progmetal of this grindier, mellow kind is nice if you are in the right mood. Which I guess I am at the moment. 7

Paara: Riitti

6.3/10

Habakuk: Once the clean Finnish singing stops, this turns quite enjoyable. 7

Myrkrarfar: Aside from some production quirks (horrible compression/mastering job, and vocal processing/auto-tuning in this genre? Really?) this folk pagan black metal really rubs both my Hugin and my Munin the right way. 7

Ziv: The raw black metal aspects of this album are great but contrast too sharply with the tediously polished bits. 6

Aggressor: Perkele black metal with some softer sides to it. 5

Bhleg: Solarmegin

5.8/10

Habakuk: You really have to enjoy yawning for this. 5

Myrkrarfar: Bhleg your pardon? What happens when atmospheric acoustic folk meets atmospheric black metal? Slightly-above-average-ity ensues. 6

Ziv: Minimalist and monotonous black metal that somehow remains interesting despite its very drawn out length. 7

Aggressor: Hmmm… summer black metal… this one was new to me. Is it trve cvlt to worship summer? I am sick of winter so I say yes. 5

Grimner: Vanadrottning

5.5/10

Habakuk: Looking for someone who’s also into Ensiferum? You can delete that OKCupid account now. 7

Myrkrarfar: Walking in Finntroll’s footsteps, albeit cornier (yes, it’s possible), Grimner’s folk pagan metal is catchy and stompy and has all the elements needed to make you want to don your handcrafted hemp shirt and dance a jig in the woods by moonlight, while druids and elves tickle your buttocks, climb up your earlobe and whisper “Who’s your daddy?” 6

Ziv: Medieval black metal full troubadours, warmongering and festive merriment. No wait, here it is: FUCK OFF!! 2

Aggressor: This is some flute-heavy folk metal of the rawer kind and how I think it should be. Oh, and not a single accordion in sight. 7

Harakiri for the Sky: Arson

5.3/10

Habakuk: For some reason I like these guys. Modern, but avoiding the suck. 7

Myrkrarfar: I wanted to hate this more than I actually do. Maybe post-black metal isn’t as horrible as I thought? Or maybe this is the exception? Yup, that must be it. 5

Ziv: An interesting take on black metal that fizzes out after the fairly killer first track. The rest has its moments, but never ultimately takes off again. 6

Aggressor: Has someone made harakiri out of boredom before? Guess I’ll be the first then. 3

The Ugly: Thanatology

5.3/10

Habakuk: Sounds a bit like Tom Angelripper had a Death Metal band. 7

Myrkrarfar: Swedish black metal that doesn’t really stand out in any way, but still gets the job done. Kinda like your mom. 6

Ziv: A smashing display of mundanity, sans a single iota of originality. Oh the aching sterility!! Well done chaps! 4

Aggressor: There are some Slayer riffs that are thrown in here and there that serve as at least something to hold on to in this otherwise rather standard-sounding black/death metal release. 4

Saxon: Thunderbolt

5.0/10

Habakuk: The band Anvil want to be. For no immediately apparent reason. 6

Myrkrarfar: Saxoff. 3

Ziv: Credit to Saxon for still regularly releasing albums. As with most of their work, a few cool tunes stick out amongst the mass of lukewarm dullards. 5

Aggressor: Some songs are kickass, some are a bit tired, but it feels like the album is rushing by, so I must be having a good time listening to it. I am also weak for the very heartwarming Motörhead tribute. 6

Thy Antichrist: Wrath of the Beast

5.0/10

Habakuk: My personal antichrist. Surprisingly little personalization to my tastes. 6

Myrkrarfar: The horrible lyrics and annoying vocals didn’t completely ruin this record for me, which means the riffs and attitude must have some qualities to them. 5

Ziv: Beware of the wrath of a very bored beast… meow. 5

Aggressor: Onkel Tom, is that you? Sometimes not only the voice but even the vocal “melodies” remind me of Sodom. Too bad that that is the only thing, since this sure would need some of them riffs and discofeelinki. 4

Angra: Ømni

5.0/10

Habakuk: Kai Hansen called. He wants nothing back, just leave. 4

Myrkrarfar: Fabio (seriously, isn’t Fabio the coolest (male) name ever? Along with Günther and Arnold, of course) Lione sings his heart out and the Brazilian ethno influences are always a treat. Too bad I can’t remember any of the hooks even after several spins. 5

Ziv: The Brazilian Helloween is back with another album of pure pompous power metal for their fans to indulge in. I’ve already moved on. 5

Aggressor: There is some power in this metal, but not even the mighty voice of Fabio can give this album any omnipotence. 6

Tengger Cavalry: Cian Bi

3.8/10

Habakuk: There is this picture on the internet of some hipster guy riding a camel. These Mongolian-throat-singing guys curiously remind me of him. 4

Myrkrarfar: “St. Anger” riffing. Auto-tuned vocals. Techno bleep-bloop sounds. Guitars and bass not in tune with the folk instruments. A mix job done by a mentally disabled orc who didn’t finish his audio engineering degree. Some album, this pile of yak dung. 1

Ziv: The shittiness of cheap world music mixed with lame metal, a concept so nineties but luckily for us updated for the millennial generation. Behold the future past. 3

Aggressor: Have Laibach made a metal album? No, but this Mongolian ethnic/industrial metal is the weirdest shit I’ve heard in my short period at GDiD. But it’s got a strange allure to it, and after a while I really enjoy the monotonous speaking vocals and the ethnic melodies. Too bad the band apparently is broken up. 7

Therion: Beloved Antichrist

3.5/10

Habakuk: And if you thought female operatic singing sucked in metal bands – check out this for the male version. 1

Myrkrarfar: Prison torturers, we’ve got a new candidate for you when your “St. Anger” copies wear out! Three hours. Three. Fucking. Hours. 3

Ziv: A musically shit œuvre mixing the worst of operetta with the cheapness of bad goth metal. 4

Aggressor: 46 songs!? I would need the whole month’s Audio Autopsy to make a fair review it feels like… The first impression though is that there is a lot of opera here. A LOT. With all this epicness you are bound to cross over to the ridiculous side a few times, but there is a couple of good tunes here. 6

Thaurorod: Coast of Gold

3.5/10

Habakuk: There is one band that is allowed to have sailships on the cover, and that WAS Running Wild. Get out. 3

Myrkrarfar: Frantic power metal with a horrific guitar tone. Only works when you’ve drunk too much coffee and eaten a million candy bars in your Zelda pajamas. 3

Ziv: More horrid Finnish power metal but with a pirate intrigue. Oh joy. 3

Aggressor: This album grew a bit on me after getting over the allover weak vocals – both when it comes to technicality and power-wise – they even make Joacim Cans sound big and bombastic. There could also have been some stronger melodies here for sure too. 5

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