GLOBAL DOMINATION

IS DEAD

Audio Autopsy – May 2015

Audio Autopsy – May 2015

01/05/15  ||  Global Domination

Enforcer: From beyondPrint

7.0/10

Habakuk: Some of these tunes are insane. A bit of filler, too, but still a damn good heavy metal record. Dig that, in 2015. 8

CadenZ: The 80’s are back, and I’m lovin’ it. Major evolutionary steps have been taken on the songwriting department from their last album. 9

sincan: Maybe it is me but I didn’t find so many super hits on Enforcer’s latest offering. But if you’re into the retro heavy speed metal thing with white oversized shoes, this is for you! 6

Cobal Caldera: Regardless the fact that I was really hooked by several moments in this album, what I actually respect of these people is how they manage to pull off pure 80s speed metal with dignity. And credibility. And quality, of course. It’s not always about inventing shit, you see, keeping traditions is just as important. Yes: traditions. 8

sly: Great old school heavy speed metal that actually takes back me to the ’80s. Another win for Enforcer! 8

Trauma: This is exactly the type of music that should stay placed firmly in its own in time.  Which is not the present.  3

Melechesh: Enkimelechesh-enki

7.0/10

Habakuk: Oh yes, Nile thrash. These guys I always wanted to pay more attention to. Why not start at “Enki”? Exaaactly. Dude. 9

CadenZ: Energetic thrashy extreme metal with epic ambitions. Well-played and well-arranged, but Melechesh’sh’shhs’hhshsh”s musical ideas certainly don’t reach the lofty heights as, say, Emperor’s did. Unfair comparison much? Fuck you. 6

sincan: There are some interesting oriental tunes and innovative riffs on this one. Check out if you’re a sucker for such things. 7

Cobal Caldera: I do respect how Melechesh manage to develop a unique style out of something that might very well have ended up just being a one trick thing. Lots of detail to listen to. 6

sly: Ass pummeling black metal that largely relies on several variations of one riff. 6

Trauma: I don’t have anything particularly eloquent or profound to say about Melechesh, other than that the music is fucken good.  Riffs, grooves, all of it.  8

Enslaved: In timesenslaved-in-times

6.7/10

Habakuk: This is not for me. 5

CadenZ: The Bergen boys’ mix of extreme viking prog metal is always an enticing and epic one, albeit sometimes at the cost of coherence and punch. I believe that it’s possible to write long songs AND keep them immediate and interesting, without losing atmosphere. If Opeth can do it, you can do it. 6

sincan: The progressive and sometimes epic Enslaved is a fine craftmanship yet it is pretty boring to be honest. 7

Cobal Caldera: This is a great fucking record… even if Enslaved seem to be determined to be the best black metal followers of Opeth… 8

sly: A few cool riffs, some lukewarm ideas, an abundance of clear shitty vocals, and no sense of direction songwise. I miss the Enslaved of long ago. 5

Trauma: Had they never opened for Opeth here in the US, I probably would have not given Enslaved the chance they deserved.  They have consistently impressed me (except maybe RIITIIR, still haven’t gotten into that one), and this go around is no different.  The songs themsevles are varied enough to not feel as long as they are.  I could have this album on repeat for weeks on end and probably not get tired of it.  9

Psycroptic: Psycropticpsycroptic-psycroptic

6.3/10

Habakuk: Yes yes yes. Sacking the frog vocals definitely was a good idea. Progressive, catchy, thrashy, deathy. 8

CadenZ: Chuck’s heritage is carried on by the likes of Revocation, Obscura, Decapitated, and these fuckers. I hope the late legend is as pleased as I am. 8

sincan: Why have dogs doing the vocals? 4

Cobal Caldera: Pretty enjoyable record; it’s fast, powerful and groovy, and I like the hardcore-ish vibe to it. However if I recall correctly, “The Inherited Repression” impressed me better. 7

sly: Tough guy death metal is always a pleasure to hear. Although maybe you guys should just stick to the acoustic mumbo jumbo. Or start a career in flamenco music. But that would strip you of all street cred. Gah, what a dilemma! 4

Trauma: I don’t know how they do it, but they can reuse the same small sampling of riffs over and over, every album, and still make them sound good.  Seriously, it’s a fucken achievement not to be ignored.  7

Dødheimsgard: A umbra omegadodheimsgard-a-umbra-omega

6.2/10

Habakuk: These guys always want a little more than they achieve. 6

CadenZ: Schizophrenic and nightmare-inducing, DHG is a substance not to be taken in huge doses. I guess that’s the point? 6

sincan: I don’t know about this one. Yes it is pretty good from time to time but the constant pretentious theater thing gets pretty annoying. 6

Cobal Caldera: It seems to be a great month for overly-evolved-blackish metal. 8

sly: A highly intense and original release that travels to the far out netherworlds of the black metal realm. Not for everyone. 8

Trauma: “Supervillain Outcast” was a good album.  This one reminds me nothing of that one.  It begins slow, and hilariously bad at times in the first proper track.  Screams and vocals at which I just can’t help but crack up.  It also doesn’t help that the damn tracks are all over 10 minutes long… Forward in time — yup!  Call me immature, but these vocals are doing more to make me laugh than to take the music seriously.  There are only a few select sections of each tune that are even remotely black metal.  Not that that’s a factor to be good, but… I’d much prefer those sections due to just being better crafted.  Blue Moon Duel ended the album on a better note than Aphelion Void began.  3

Sorcerer: In the shadow of the inverted cross

sorcerer-in-the-shadow-of-the-inverted-cross

6.2/10

Habakuk: Suffice it to say I was expecting MUCH worse. 6

CadenZ: Extremely Swedish-sounding doom/heavy metal from, you guessed it, Sweden. A capable singer and Kristian Niemann’s fantastic guitar solos lift these mediocre songs a bit, but not enough to induce a full-on hard-on. 6

sincan: Finally something not made out of plastic, classic heavy metal. 6

Cobal Caldera: I’d normally be delighted having the chance to review this kind of doom metal for AA, but this one feels rather unfulfilled. There are moments in which you can indeed feel some passion to the songs, but I’m still not convinced. 5

sly: Classic ’80s Swedish doom metal. Nothing new here, but it’s a nostalgic trip to the past! 7

Trauma: The lyrics are corny as fuck, but I can’t help but actually enjoy the music.  They sometimes cut a little too close to that big wheel o’ cheese that tends to stink up metal.  I do like some of the Candlemass-esque riffage.  7

Fortid: 9fortid-9

6.0/10

Habakuk: Blah blah blah. 5

CadenZ: Sounds a bit like Enslaved did 15 years ago. Not bad. Not bad at all. 7

sincan: 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 lacking songwriting 17 18 19 can’t count higher. 5

Cobal Caldera: The worst thing that could’ve happened to this record is being reviewed on the same edition as Enslaved’s… Great dark melodies, by the way, proof that guitar solos can play an important role in black metal records. 8

sly: Generic beyond generic. Some might dig it but most won’t care. 4

Trauma: Fortid has taken really long for me to completely digest.  They’ve got great riffs, great melodies… but, there is shit that I can’t quite get past yet.  Vocals mostly.  Otherwise I find the music to be to my liking.  7

Ufomammut: Ecateufomammut-ecate

6.0/10

Habakuk: Still going strong. 7

CadenZ: When a mammoth lumbers in space, you can’t hear its footsteps. 6

sincan: DooOoOoOOom yeah. 7

Cobal Caldera: Nice stoner but ultimately too similar to all that stoner out there. 5

sly: Heavy psychedelic stoner sludge that certain fans of the genre will lap up. Personally, I wouldn’t waste my weed smoking up to these guys. 5

Trauma: I have zero familiarity with Ufomammut, and was a little wary with the length of the first track and the sort of droning going on.  However, my worries were unfounded because this was actually way easier to listen through.  It’s an impossibly long album, but does have some longer tracks.  Something about it is very simple and just easy to listen, which I like very much.  It doesn’t blow the fucken doors off of any genre nor is it blazing a trail down some mysterious path.  It’s just good.  6

The Monolith Deathcult: Bloodcvltsthe-monolith-deathcult-bloodcvlts

5.8/10

Habakuk: The constant “provocation” is getting a little annoying I gotta say. 6

CadenZ: Sometimes it’s just super awesome to have your ass handed to you. Top-notch fucking annihilation through and through. 9

sincan: Deathened death with actually some good stuff going on from time to time. 7

Cobal Caldera: What’s all the hype about? Take my word: bo-ring! 4

sly: Their “industrial” tinged death metal may have potential… or not. 5

Trauma: Chaotic music, but chaotic in a way that I begin to get agitated listening to it.  I don’t like the vocals very much, and the tunes don’t have any qualities that enable me to ignore that glaringly obvious fact.  Maybe the production makes it problematic.  I can’t really tell because I don’t recall liking their last album all that much.  I only remember some green centurion or legionnaire or whatever on the cover.  4

Moonspell: Extinctmoonspell-extinct

5.0/10

Habakuk: Well, the oriental flair they throw in at times isn’t too bad, but Moonspell, plain and simple, are not the shit. For a combination of both, see Melechesh. 5

CadenZ: Goth me up, bitch. 6

sincan: So they have become a fancy goth rock band? Good for them, or something. 4

Cobal Caldera: This is actually a decent record. Are we talking about the same Moonspell who released memorable pieces of shit as “Aura noir”? Even the alternative vibe kinda makes sense. 7

sly: Ultra crappy commercial crap. But were these guys ever good? 1

Trauma: I don’t remember if it’s cool or not to like this band.  I do actually like this album, so it’s probably not cool to like Moonspell.  Fuck, I’m a hipster now.  7

Europe: War of kingseurope-war-of-kings

4.8/10

Habakuk: Gotta say I would have suspected them to have a little less thump. 5

CadenZ: I’m a fan of both their 80’s cheese and the rougher, bluesier output of the latest few records. Sadly, this album lacks the hits that would elevate it past pleasant background music. John Norum still kills, though. 5

sincan: War of dad-rock. 5

Cobal Caldera: Could be much, much worse (refer my comment on Scorpions’ last month). 5

sly: Not thrilling but could be a hell of a lot worse. 4

Trauma: I’m far from a fan of Europe, but there are qualities that I can smile toward and even hope that maybe someday I can appreciate them to their fullest.  Alas, there are still many roadblocks from making my acceptance full.  The band is okay, too, I guess.  The guitar sound does not do the riffs too many favors, which is a shame.  5

Loch Vostok: From these watersloch-vostok-from-these-waters

4.3/10

Habakuk: Is my brain turning circles or are bands just very similar these days? 6

CadenZ: Pretty nice prog metal with the occasional growl and blast. They got this slick 80’s atmosphere which is always pleasant. Slick is nice. Slick in Swedish means lick. Like in “slicka fitta”. Licking pussy. In Swedish. Now you know. Pleasant was the word. 6

sincan: Modern (as in pretty boring) “extreme” metal. 5

Cobal Caldera: Thank you, Loch Vostok, for showing the world how not to “progressive”. 3

sly: The pussy clear vocals ruin any potential this band might have. Plus they sound old. 3

Trauma: This had a lot of promise at the beginning, but that’s all I was left with.  3

Therapy?: Disquiet

therapy-disquiet

2.8/10

Habakuk: The old brilliance shines through very rarely. Torment, sorrow, misery, strihife! 6

CadenZ: I might need therapy to remove the memory of this piece of shit out of my mind. 1

sincan: Darkened punk rock which sometimes almost is good and I feel ashamed. 4

Cobal Caldera: Still hurts. 2

sly: ’90s angst ridden heavy alternative rock that really, really sucks. No, I mean really. I can’t stand this shit. It depresses me that people would actually be happy about these cumfarters releasing a new album. 0

Trauma: I don’t quite get what they’re asking? 4

Liturgy: The ark workliturgy-the-ark-work

2.5/10

Habakuk: Wasn’t this this uber hipster black metal band I had never actually listened to? Sounds like it! Interesting? Does not sound like it! 4

CadenZ: Hipster black metal with lots of weird shit thrown in, like industrial synths/samplings and grunge-like whiny clean vocals. Sometimes it’s quite enjoyable, but the quality isn’t on the same level as their ambitions. 4

sincan: I guess their tactics before writing this album was something like “Let’s see how much shit one can pile on a record?” and it worked out I guess. It sounds like if their sampling was some live over a 56k modem . 1

Cobal Caldera: A great score for an 8-bit videogame about castles and shit. Not offensive, but come on, WTF is up with the vocals?! 4

sly: No matter what people may have told you, these guys have sucked from the beginning. Their turd release cleverly incorparates annoyance into every possible aspect. They sound like a cheap and bleaker OM desperately trying to be hip. 1

Trauma: This has got to be a joke.  Because this is neither entertaining nor enlightening.  I can go into Logic Studio right now and start clicking on the piano roll with about 30 different random instruments and make the same shit.  1

The Poodles: Devil in the detailsthe-poodles-devil-in-the-details

2.3/10

Habakuk: The guitars are surprisingly decent, the vocals expectedly uninteresting. 5

CadenZ: What. The. Fuck. I used to like the singer’s voice, now he sounds old. I used to like their melodic glam rock, now we get some kind of One Direction/Justin Bieber shit mixed with Coldplay arrangements, and sucky ones at that? Fuck. You. 1

sincan: I’m not into ass juice, but thanks. 2

Cobal Caldera: I was expecting this to be embarrassing. It’s not. In fact, they’re gifted musicians… aaand still, I give exactly zero fucks about this kind of metal. 3

sly: The glam version of Moonspell. Say no more. 1

Trauma: If “(What the Hell) Baby” is not the rock/metal equivalent of Backstreet Boys, you may shove a big veiny purple dildo up my butt.  2

 

 

 

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