GLOBAL DOMINATION

IS DEAD

Audio Autopsy – November 2014

Audio Autopsy – November 2014

01/11/14  ||  Global Domination

Cannibal Corpse: A skeletal domain  CannibalCorpseASkeletalDomain           

7.0/10

Habakuk: Not spectacular but pretty hard to criticize. 7

CadenZ: Hacksaw meats forearm, and the spattering makes a mildly entertaining sound. 6

Cobal Caldera: And the Cannibal does the trick again… Isn’t it sad that they’re still so relevant, up to the point of having released the most consistent album of this edition? What does that tell you about metal these days? Is the word stuck in the past ringing any bells? 7

sincan: Bring out your death, here comes the virgins, oh, sorry I meant the opposite. These old fucks sounds like I remembered them doing, but remember that my mind sometimes is as strong as you, thus not strong. 7

sly: Another ass-pummeling, bone-crushing death metal album that reminds the world that nobody can really mess with these guys. 8

YOB: Clearing the path to ascendyob-clearing-the-path-to-ascend

6.8/10

Habakuk: I had a phase when I was sort of into this kind of doom, but these days it’s hard to get into it. 6

CadenZ: Yes. Crush my puny skull with thy hammer ov doom. Pulverise me. I am yours. 8

Cobal Caldera: Seems like the perfect album to get high at… Even clean, I listened to a few very nice moments here. The rest is just passable. 6

sincan: Maybe this one takes time to fully get into but the track “Nothing to win” has already won, massive heavy tremolo Yob gets it done. 8

sly: Kings of the yawn-doom-metal genre, Yob’s newest offering is another gift of sonic narcolepsy. 6

Decapitated: Blood mantradecapitated-blood-mantra

6.4/10

Habakuk: Please refer to my comment for Sick of it All. 7

CadenZ: Head meets bang, and I just moshed the shit out of my living room. 8

Cobal Caldera: This is pretty amazing and still, I do have to major complains: 1) I can’t help getting a Meshuggah vibe to it and 2) good shit and all, 2 out of 7 tracks is all my memory will retain. If that. 7

sincan: Meh, technical death, thus killing technically. 6

sly: Decapitated have (d)evolved from a decent technical death metal band to into a righteously boring nu-death metal outfit. Soulfly on speed, anyone? 4

1349: Massive cauldron of chaos1349-Massive-Cauldron-Of-Chaos

6.3/10

Habakuk: Not bad, but I am not into black metal THAT much. 6

CadenZ: Slayer meets Dark Funeral, and moderately good is the new black. 6

sincan: It takes about 0.1 second to figure out which band is back when the music kicks in. It’s fast, it’s good and it is still not perfect. 7

sly: Black metal veterans 1349 have begifted us with a solid album mixed with melody and brutality. It could use an extra dose of brutality though, as unfortunately the album comes off as almost “nice”; it’s too polished and just not dark enough. 6

Electric Wizard: Time to dieelectric-wizard-time-to-die

6.0/10

Habakuk: Still doing their iconic thing. 6

CadenZ: Black Sabbath without the subtleties that made them legends. Too fucking boring. 5

Cobal Caldera: Time to do something different. Or die. 4

sincan: Well, well, well, look who is back. The über hyped band from UK is back with a darkened doomed guitarr attack offering and who am I to complain? However I miss a sing along track like “Legalise drugs & murder”, but I guess that this is a grower. 7

sly: Electric Wizard is one of those bands with whom you always know what to expect, yet every album is a bit different. This latest release is darker, more psychedelic, and reveals a new layer with every spin. 8

Khold: Til endeskhold-til-endes

6.0/10

Habakuk: Actually quite enjoyable! Groovy black metal that had me at the “Troops of Doom” cover. 7

CadenZ: Denim vest meets corpse paint, and the air drums come out of the closet. 6

Cobal Caldera: Mid-paced black metal of the badass type that takes off making the best of primitive sinister riffs, but ends up getting old after so many tracks. A damn shame. 5

sincan: This is a decent black metal album, but it is a bit too uninteresting and generic in my dominant opinion. 6

sly: The blackest of the black metal bands for this month’s AA, yet their best track is a cover of Sepultura’s “Troops of Doom”. 6

Wolf: Devil seedWolf_Devil-Seed

6.0/10

Habakuk: Talented yes, worth my time: no. 6

CadenZ: “Shark Attack” is an instant classic, too bad all Wolf mojo went into that one song. 6

Cobal Caldera: Probably Sweden has made us used to top-notch shit, up to the point -almost- nothing is good enough. Specially when it comes to the subject of 80s-oriented heavy metal bands resembling Mercyful Fate… 5

sincan: This old school heavy metal is not that bad to be honest, even though it sometimes balances on the boarder towards cheesiness. 7

sly: Decent traditional heavy metal that doesn’t slay many dragons but puts other traditional heavy metal bands to shame, which means the bar isn’t very high at the moment. 6

Sick Of It All: The last act of defianceSick-Of-It-All-the-Last-Act-of-Defiance

5.8/10

Habakuk: Not bad, and no surprises – but I liked the one before better. 7

CadenZ: More metal than most of today’s “metal”. 6

Cobal Caldera: Hardcore punk with all the tricks. Not that they’re discovering shit, but damn, did I feel like punching someone in the face! 7

sincan: I’m already sick of Sick of it all. 3

sly: Hadn’t heard these guys in a while and they still sound like themselves, which is a good thing. But this album fails to inspire a living room moshpit. 6

Dark Fortress: Venereal dawndark-fortress-venereal-dawn

5.6/10

Habakuk: Dork Fortress actually aren’t as bad as their name might suggest. 5

CadenZ: Gloomy introverted BM meets Opeth, and I’m lamenting the departure of energy. Even though the atmosphere is there, the songs are too long and ploddy. 6

Cobal Caldera: Not half bad, actually. Didn’t particularly love the Dimmu/Cradle worship parts, though. Nonetheless, 7

sincan: This album is a roller coaster with it’s ups and downs and I hear similarities with Ghost, Triptykon and other darkened spiritual masterminds, but the length makes it impossible to fully enjoy. 6

sly: Slick, romantic, and pretentious black metal that’s as evil and scary as an ice cream sundae. Mmm, ice cream… 4

Bullet: Storm of bladesbullet-storm-of-blades

5.4/10

Habakuk: Oh yes. If even a retarded squealer like the one at hand can’t mess it up, it gotta be good. 8

CadenZ: Brian Johnson meets condor, and I can’t stand his voice for more than three tracks. Otherwise not too shabby. 6

Cobal Caldera: Too many rip offs for one record. 3

sincan: Never really got hooked by their retro rock/metal thing, but I would say that they to it pretty OK if you’re into this kind of thing. 5

sly: Accept meets Judas Priest with a dash of Anvil. But if that sounds interesting to you, you’ll be disappointed when you hear the nails-on-a-chalkboard vocals. It’s almost a shame. Luckily I don’t give a fuck. 5

Crucified Barbara: In the redcrucified-barbara-in-the-red

4.4/10

Habakuk: I expected the worst, but hey – this is OK. 6

CadenZ: Denim meets glam rock, and I could see myself spinning this as a soundtrack for beerage, but not much else. 5

Cobal Caldera: That’s the problem with prefabricated cumbucket bands: They produce nothing but disposable music and ashaming videoclips. ‘But wait,’ I can almost hear you say, ‘they’re hot chicks and they can play their instruments!’ Fuck it, Nuclear Blast doesn’t pay me enough… Oh, wait. They don’t pay me at all. 2

sincan: Well executed rock’n’roll in the typical semi sleaze manner. It doesn’t ring my fungus. 5

sly: A run-of-the-mill sucky bar band whose music is as good as their moniker. And it’s all girls. Hooray. 4

Audrey Horne: Pure heavyaudrey-horne-pure-heavy

4.0/10

Habakuk: Yawn Rock. 4

CadenZ: Thin Lizzy meets AC/DC, and my foot is tapping. 6

Cobal Caldera: Unlike many other revival bands, this isn’t embarrassing. Still, I don’t quite see where it’s going. 5

sincan: Pure boring dad rock. 4

sly: If you’re looking for something that combines bad Thin Lizzy, ’80s FM rock, and bland ’90s “heavy” pop, then I think you’ve found your dream band. Congratulations. 1

Slash: World on fireslash-world-on-fire

4.0/10

Habakuk: I put the entire November AA playlist on shuffle and any time I felt an urge to press skip, I checked and it was Slash. 2

CadenZ: A bit too poppy (especially the vocals) but I’ll gladly wag my penis in time to this. 6

Cobal Caldera: First I had a boner. Then I gave this a second spin. “Beneath the Savage Sun” is a great fucken track nevertheless. 7

sincan: I’m so uninterested in this type of cool carpe diem rock’n’roll, and the vocals? What? 3

sly: Myles Kennedy’s voice is awful. It sounds like a rockier version of that douche from Maroon 5. He manages to kill off the otherwise decent music. 2

Godsmack: 1000hpGodsmack-1000hp

2.4/10

Habakuk: James Hetfield and the Hot Rod Gang. 5

CadenZ: Mustasch meets Nickelback, and my shotgun is coming out to play. 2

Cobal Caldera: I’m too metal for this shit. 0

sincan: Wow cool dude, let’s party and drink booze yeah. 4

sly: Godsmack have been sucking cock since the beginning and absolutely nothing has changed. 1

In Flames: Siren charmsin-flames-siren-charms

2.4/10

Habakuk: I’m not a huge In Flames fan, but one thing that has always enjoyable about them, and also their newer stuff, was their catchy, infectious melodic side. Yet the songs just plod along, and what I used to enjoy is absolutely absent. In Flames Out of Mojo. 4

CadenZ: So they spent millions to record this piece of shit at the Hansa Studios in Berlin, huh. Too bad the snare sound is worse than my Windows Wavetable MIDI snare. And the rest is worse. 2

Cobal Caldera: How can anyone still listen to this crap? 3

sincan: I just didn’t want to listen to this album at all, but now you fucking forced me to and no, I don’t want to act cool, I just don’t want to put feces into my ears more than I have to. Just by hearing Anders first sentences made the few who still believed in In flames to cut of their own genitals and microwave them. It’s like they want to sound crap, and Gothenburg already had an emo pop rock band who can’t be beaten by this junk. 2

sly: Ohs nos, nu metal IS making a comeback! In Flames have decided to go mainstream, and good luck to them. As much as they sucked before, they’ve really taken it to the next level. Maybe they can have a cockslurping competition under the bridge with Godsmack and Audrey Horne. 1

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