Audio Autopsy – April 2013

Audio Autopsy – April 2013

01/04/13  ||  Global Domination

Suffocation: Pinnacle of bedlam Suffocation: Pinnacle of bedlam


Lord K: You know what you get with Suffocation. Death metal. US death metal. Above average but far from being superior. 7

Habakuk: The best thing about new Suffocation
records is that they re-record old stuff from “Breeding the Spawn”.
Still, this isn’t half bad. 7

CadenZ: Although good, I’ve always thought of
Suffocation as slightly over-rated. I might have to reconsider and
revisit their back catalogue. 7

BamaHammer: This is a band that has always clicked
with me. I like their old classics, and I even liked them after their
reboot back in ’04. This album is probably their best effort of that
latter era. 9

Sokaris: That first song Suffo released had me
scared. It sounded like a weak-ass deathified version of Exodus’ “War
is my shephard.” The rest of the album stands up though, typical
crushing, techy brutality but what the fuck else would you want at this
point? 8

Necrowretch: Putrid death sorcery Necrowretch: Putrid death sorcery


Lord K: Seems like they dig their old-school
Swedish death/black metal, which is fine with me. The early Necrophobic
vibes put a smile on my face and the general atmosphere of this disc is
somewhat appreciated in these times of Pro Tools and computerized
productions. Can’t say I give much of a fuck about this new breed of
“tribute” bands though. But it’s decent-to-good stuff, this. 6

Habakuk: This oozes old school. I have to give it an 8, even if I suspect it doesn’t have huge lasting value. 8

CadenZ: If your vocalist is going to sound like a
crow, make him sound like an evil and diabolical fucken crow. Like this
guy. Very somber death metal with obvious Necrophobic influences. Daddy
likes, quite a lot. 8

BamaHammer: I’m not a fan of the dry production, but the riffs are groovy to keep me happy for a little while. 6

Sokaris: Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, WAIT.
So Century Media is scooping up bands like this and Morbus Chron and
reissuing stuff like old Thanatos these days? Maybe they’re trying to
cash in on OSDM but I give no fucks. This rules, even with the absurd reverb. 8

Vreid: Welcome farewell Vreid: Welcome farewell


Lord K: I thought I would hate this, but I don’t. Make no mistake though, I’m not actually loving it. More than “just” black metal, for what it’s worth. 4

Habakuk: Black metal that goes easy on the blasting and adds a bit of a catchy, rockish old school feel. I think I dig it. 8

CadenZ: As much tasty Unanimated-type melodic death/black as primitive Norwegian BM. What’s not to love? 8

BamaHammer: No-nonsense melodic black n’ roll. This is nowhere near Vreid’s best effort, but it’s still really good. 7

Sokaris: I’ve not kept up with Vreid much since in
my head they’re filed as the thing the Windir guys did when the main
songwriter died. Definitely an unfair categorization as they’re
definitely a different animal and have put forth a damn fine effort.
Time for me to do some catching up. 8

Tormention: Hunger for flesh Tormention: Hunger for flesh


Lord K: Tormention is easily one of the best death
bands Sweden’s got to offer right now. I order you guys to go get this
album. Buy it. Support them. This is how you fucken do it and this is
why Sweden is the undisputed king of this particular style. 8

Habakuk: Sounds like CC, Aeon and so forth, but fails to evoke any strong feelings in either direction. 7

CadenZ: Forgettable but professional (and decent) death metal. 6

BamaHammer: This is some fairly generic Swedish
death metal, which is better than a fairly generic prison rape or a
fairly generic Blümchen album. Right, guys? Right? 6

Sokaris: Sick, disgusting, old school worship.
Goddamn dripping with gore and sick. It’s over the top, even cartoonish
at points but it’s a fucken blast. 8

Skineater: Dermal harvest Skineater: Dermal harvest


Lord K: Matte Modin will always be one of my fave
drummers. Great to hear him doing some “real” metal again. The melodies
are nice, the brutality is intact and the performances are flawless.
With the right backing I’m sure they’ll move on to greater things. The
potential is here. 7

Habakuk: If you absolutely need one Cannibal Corpse clone this month, take Tormention instead. 6

CadenZ: Nothing wrong with this putrid pile of
steaming death songs. The highest peaks are missing, but other than that
you’ll have a hard time finding anything to complain about. 8

BamaHammer: Skineater sounds like a million other
death metal bands out there these days, and they don’t do nearly enough
to give themselves an identity. They’re not quite Peniseater but they
aren’t Greateither. 6

Sokaris: Decent, if generic, death metal with an
unfortunately flat production. Some highlights but I bet this comes off
way better live. 6

Desolate Shrine: The sanctum of human darkness Desolate Shrine: The sanctum of human darkness


Lord K: Too much shit entering my stereo today.
This death/doom stew is poorly produced and uninteresting on exactly
every level you can think of. Whoever decided to include this shit in AA
should be hit in the nuts with a fucken baseball bat. Can’t possibly
score it lower than the abomination that is AA-colleagues Bullet For My
Valentine though. At least this is metal. Or something. 3

Habakuk: They’ve got dissonant death/doom down, but I feel a little more songwriting couldn’t hurt. 6

CadenZ: The oppressive atmosphere that permeated
the debut album is intact. High quality anti-life doom/death that shows,
to their advantage, even more glimpses of DS’s black metal sound.
Looking forward to that baseball bat, K! 8

BamaHammer: Loud, noisy, ugly, plodding death metal with a nihilistic black metal attitude. I dig it. 7

Sokaris: I’m digging this whole monochromatic,
oppressive death metal thing that seems to be all the rage these days.
Desolate Shrine aren’t quite as obscure sounding as a lot of bands that
fit that description, but in an increased element of groove makes up for
it. 8

Kongh: Sole creation Kongh: Sole creation


Lord K: I never understood the hype about this band
and “Sole creation” leaves me as unknowing as before, though I _can
_dig a few things here and there on this piece. 4

Habakuk: Mastodon with less notes and heavier doom influence. Pretty good! 8

CadenZ: You are the anvil. Kongh is the hammer.
Hetfield is the table. Rough, unpolished doom/death with a hostile
atmosphere. Me like. 8

BamaHammer: Christ this is some slow, filthy, dirgy shit. Don’t trust my opinion on stuff like this. I find it boring as hell. 3

Sokaris: I wish I could say these songhs suck dongh
just because I like to throw out smartass, insulting puns (they’re
exquisite delicacies to writers) but it’s… well, okay. The songs are a
bit too longh, though, HA! 5

Omnium Gatherum: Beyond Omnium Gatherum: Beyond


Lord K: More carnival/Disney metal, but unlike
Eternal Tears Of Assholes (rightfully placed further down), Omnium
Gatherum’s got themselves some more Amon Amarth in their music and don’t
blow completely. I’ll never be a fan though, but it kinda works if you
have lost every single one of your other CD’s. 4

Habakuk: If you like this kind of stuff, i.e. melodic death metal with a little elusive Gothic vibe, check this album out. 7

CadenZ: A suckier version of Godgory with a
constipated vocalist (seems like most Finnish melodeath bands have that
problem). This was old in 1998. 4

BamaHammer: All these melodic death metal bands should probably just go ahead and call it a day. 4

Sokaris: For the most part I’m really disgusted by
how melodic death metal has evolved. Sacrificing the genre’s core
appeal (sharp, catchy, thrash-influenced licks) for ill-advised
inclusions of electronica and angst. Omnium Gatherum are fortunately
more Dark Tranquillity than they are In Flames in this regard. 8

Eternal Tears Of Sorrow: Saivon lapsi Eternal Tears Of Sorrow: Saivon lapsi


Lord K: Disney metal, people. Disney metal. I can
dig me some electronics and crap in my music, that’s no secret, but I
can’t possibly dig it when it’s sounding like Eternal Tears Of SoHo.
Considering the fact that the keyboards take over the majority of the
sound picture, I’m sure whoever’s playing them runs this band. At least
they look grim and all, that must count for something. Actually, no – it doesn’t. 3

Habakuk: Finland. 5

CadenZ: Melodic elf death with a constipated crow
on vocals. Even though some parts are above average, the Disney aura
that permeates the disc constantly kills my pseudo-boner. 5

BamaHammer: I got depressed just reading the band
name. Symphonic extreme metal with fairies on keyboards and chicks
ooh-ing and ah-ing is never going to be something I’ll be into. It’s not
quite Nintendo metal, but it’s Sega Genesis metal, and that’s close
enough. 3

Sokaris: I’m finally becoming okay with the fact
that the new EToS sounds less like their old stuff than Kalmah (who was
basically formed by a member exodus years back) and I’m digging it.
Sounds like a grower but for now I can give it a solid… 8

Stratovarius: Nemesis Stratovarius: Nemesis


Lord K: The only time I gave a fuck about
Stratovarius was when that Tolkki guy went batshit insane and pissed on
his band mates. Those were fun times. I’m too fucken metal for this.
Right. 4

Habakuk: If your main instrument is a keyboard, count me out. Fuck this shit. 2

CadenZ: Blip. Blop. Blipety-blop. Bloop. Bloooooooooooooooooop. 3

BamaHammer: Yes, you read that right. Against your wishes, Stratovarius is still trying. 4

Sokaris: Goddamnit I’m turning into such a fag. First Rhapsody and now this? Damnit, this isn’t half bad at all. 7

Manilla Road: Mysterium Manilla Road: Mysterium


Lord K: We just hit a new low when it comes to
productions. And I guess that goes for the vocals as well. Actually,
Manilla Road’s hitting a lot of fucken lows here. I’m happy for them. 2

Habakuk: As in the olden days, Manilla Road’s (only
– no wait, the name…) problem are the vocals. Sure they’ve changed, but
they’re still only tolerable, at best. These guys should hire JB
Christoffersson and they could be great. 5

CadenZ: Shit production, shit singer, boring songs. Apparently the Manilla Road leads to Boring Shitville. 3

BamaHammer: The ugliest dudes in metal return with another shitty album no one outside of their immediate family gives a fuck about. 2

Sokaris: My write-up of 1986 helped fuel a fledgling romance with these cult metal heroes but I’m still iffy on the vocals. 7

Otep: Hydra Otep: Hydra


Lord K: This “poetry” thing she’s including on
every goddamn album is boring me to tears, but on other occasions Otep
doesn’t suck it half as much as most other bands in this edition.
Considering the shit featured I don’t know if that’s such a hard goal to
accomplish though. 5

Habakuk: Oh, please. Does anybody over the age of
13 care about this sort of bullshit “I am so borderline I wear black
nail polish” girlie metal? 3

CadenZ: If you over-distort your already manually
distorted screams, I’m automatically gonna assume you’re a shit
vocalist. At least there was a riff or two (out of four hundred) that
were decent. 3

BamaHammer: Chick-fronted nu metal is not something I’ll ever be into. Go figure. 2

Sokaris: Even in the world of nu-metal, Slipknot did the pretentious tortured thing better and My Ruin did fem-angst first. 4

Krokus: Dirty dynamite Krokus: Dirty dynamite


Lord K: I guess it’s impressive in some ways that
these guys are still going on, but much like throughout their entire
career no one gives a shit about Krokus. This album will hardly change
that. And hey, when the fuck did they start to sound like an AC/DC clone
altogether? 3

Habakuk: Yeah, you sound like AC/DC alright. It really ain’t bad, but please, Dad. Get out of the garage, you’ll catch a cold. 6

CadenZ: Krikey, look at the size of that KROK! And its ANUS! Or as we like to call it: KROKUS! 2

BamaHammer: Krokus debuted in 1976 and sucked then.
Let your imagination go to work to give yourself an idea of how bad
they suck now. This shitty rock album gave me an obstructed bowel and
dementia. 2

Sokaris: Grandpa, come on, can you keep it down a bit? I’ve got a girl over and your friends creep her out. 3

Wednesday 13: The Dixie dead Wednesday 13: The Dixie dead


Lord K: Eh… No. Absolutely not. Go away. Forever. 2

Habakuk: Utterly forgettable. 4

CadenZ: Breakfast. Work. Lunch. Work. Dinner.
Sauna. Bed. That’s what happened on Wednesday the 13th (three weeks
ago), and I guarantee you that it was 300 million times more interesting
than this shit record. 2

BamaHammer: I hate America. 2

Sokaris: The Murderdolls were kind of a guilty
pleasure for me but realistically I don’t think anyone needs more than
like 25 minutes of this material. Piles of cliche and overtly obvious
influences that just make me miss White Zombie. 4

Bullet For My Valentine: Temper temper Bullet For My Valentine: Temper temper


Lord K: So, this is the kind of music you’re
supposed to play if you wanna hit home with the kids and make money?
Trust me, I rather stay piss poor and keep my self respect intact than
doing so. Bullet For My Valentine is fucken ridiculous and so is
everyone who’s a fan of them. Very suitable band for April Fools Day.2

Habakuk: Rockcore that I can’t bring myself to listen to. 4

CadenZ: I hear metalcore. I hear college brat pop. I hear gay. 3

BamaHammer: Bullet For My Audio Sensory Perception. 2

Sokaris: Metal for four year old girls. Does
anyone really take this garbage seriously? I do thank them, however,
for choosing a moniker that lets me know ahead of time to expect
pussified pop garbage. 3


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This entry was posted on June 19, 2014 by in Audio Autopsy.
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